Day 4: The Gift of Revenge

So, maybe your brother was a jerk when you were kids.  Maybe he gave you Wet Willies and noogies.  Maybe he locked you in a closet.  Maybe he regularly flushed the toilet while you were in the shower.  Maybe your sister cut the hair off all of your Barbies.

You've been waiting years to pay them back, like a tiger waiting to pounce.  You understood vaguely that the birth of his kids might be your launching point.  Friends, your moment has arrived.  What better way to torture your sibling than through your nieces and nephews?  And it really is for the benefit of the kids.  Christmas morning is the perfect time to unwrap a cold dish of revenge.



A Drum Set

A classic in the revenge world, a drum kit will serve as a valuable reminder that what goes around does indeed come around.  Your beloved niece or nephew will bang, beat, and crash their way into your sibling's head while learning the intracacies of rhythm and timing.



A Harmonica

A harmonica serves an especially cruel reminder that you didn't forget.  It's portable.  Encourage not-your-child to take her harmonica EVERYWHERE, in the car, to bed, and to the dinner table.  Let them know that every aspect of their parent's life needs a soundtrack.  Especially during morning coffee.

An Aquarium

Your nieces and nephews will squeal with delight when they open this beauty!  Your sibling with groan with dread.  In addition to the money your sibling's going to have to sink in to keep this puppy going, there's also the time.  Somebody's going to have to clean it, purchase food, deal with the inevitable "cloudy water" situation, and replace fish.  There is a 99.9% chance the kids will *not* do it.  The kids will learn about the responsiblity of feeding something, and your sibling will learn that you hold a grudge.  Perfection!

Awesome Noisemaker for Beginning Walkers

Every time your niece walks around the house with this gem, your sister will know that you're still ticked off that she colored your favorite doll's face with permanent marker.  Your niece can strut around the house making all kinds of commotion, and be happy as a clam!  This is a really fun toy for toddlers!

A Bow and Arrow
Surefire hit!  Your niece or nephew will love playing with this in the house if they live somewhere that is prone to snowstorms, or better yet, blizzards!  They'll develop strength and hand eye coordination in the process.  Make this winter especially long for your sibling with a bow and arrow set!

Have fun auntie or uncle!  Mwahahahaha!